1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!
2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read: The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.
3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.. Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.
4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, Are you a cop? Yes, I answered and continued writing the report My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right? Yes, that's right, I told her. Well, then, she said as she extended her foot toward me, would you please tie my shoe?
6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. Is that a dog you got back there? he asked. It sure is, I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, what'd he do?
7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, the tooth fairy will never believe this!
8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.
And why not, darling?
You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.
9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.
10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time, she said to her mother. ' can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!
11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.
Mama, look what I found, the boy called out.
What have you got there, dear?
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, I think it's Adams underwear!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
An educator
According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was
recently faced with a unique problem.
A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would
put it on in the bathroom.
That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press
their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the
girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called
all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian.
She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for
the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked
the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and
Cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers.... And then there are educators
recently faced with a unique problem.
A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would
put it on in the bathroom.
That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press
their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the
girls would put them back.
Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called
all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian.
She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for
the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.
To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked
the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.
He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and
Cleaned the mirror with it.
Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
There are teachers.... And then there are educators
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Hungry?
Some interesting tips furnished by friends:
At Cub, buy an angel food cake and ask the bakery folks to frost it. Believe it or not they will frost it and make it very special. As a quick alternative, take the angel food cake, remove from container and place on a plate; then pour cherry (or other flavors if you prefer) pie filling over it. For a real flourish top each piece with some whipped cream.
Those of you that have been to Japanese steakhouses and like that special sauce - not the teriyaki, but the other one - the following link is to the recipe to make it at home:
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Japanese-Shrimp-Sauce-I/Detail.aspx
Aged bananas work great when mashed into pancake batter. It makes a much richer pancake with a lesser need for syrup. Older bananas can be peeled and tossed into a sandwich baggie for future use. One friend advises she put the banana, peel and all, into the freezer.
Did you know that you can search for recipes at AllRecipes.com listing the ingredients that you have available? So if you have rhubarb and pears, enter both items in the search box and see if a recipe returns. If you subscribe to Taste of Home, you can do the same at their website.
Canning used by be very time consuming. While making the preserves, jelly or jam remains the same, sterizing the bottles has become a snap. Simply fill the jars with water within an inch of the top. Each microwave is different - an approximate for 5 of the 1/2 pint jars is 8 minutes. You'll see the water bubbling. Be prepared for water in the tray of your microwave (though it helps with cleaning). No more dripping ceilings.
At Cub, buy an angel food cake and ask the bakery folks to frost it. Believe it or not they will frost it and make it very special. As a quick alternative, take the angel food cake, remove from container and place on a plate; then pour cherry (or other flavors if you prefer) pie filling over it. For a real flourish top each piece with some whipped cream.
Those of you that have been to Japanese steakhouses and like that special sauce - not the teriyaki, but the other one - the following link is to the recipe to make it at home:
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Japanese-Shrimp-Sauce-I/Detail.aspx
Aged bananas work great when mashed into pancake batter. It makes a much richer pancake with a lesser need for syrup. Older bananas can be peeled and tossed into a sandwich baggie for future use. One friend advises she put the banana, peel and all, into the freezer.
Did you know that you can search for recipes at AllRecipes.com listing the ingredients that you have available? So if you have rhubarb and pears, enter both items in the search box and see if a recipe returns. If you subscribe to Taste of Home, you can do the same at their website.
Canning used by be very time consuming. While making the preserves, jelly or jam remains the same, sterizing the bottles has become a snap. Simply fill the jars with water within an inch of the top. Each microwave is different - an approximate for 5 of the 1/2 pint jars is 8 minutes. You'll see the water bubbling. Be prepared for water in the tray of your microwave (though it helps with cleaning). No more dripping ceilings.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
From the mouths of babes...
Children's science exam answers...
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (Brilliant, love this!)
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (The kid gets an A+ for this answer!)
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A: Premature death
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? ( e.g., abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does 'varicose' mean? (I do love this one..)
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarian Section.'
A: The Caesarian Section is a district in Rome .
Q: What does the word 'benign' mean?'
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (Brilliant, love this!)
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (The kid gets an A+ for this answer!)
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A: Premature death
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? ( e.g., abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does 'varicose' mean? (I do love this one..)
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarian Section.'
A: The Caesarian Section is a district in Rome .
Q: What does the word 'benign' mean?'
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Unusual quotes (not verified)
I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: - 'No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.'
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
- Mark Twain
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.
- George Burns
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy;
if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
I have never hated a man enough to give back his diamonds.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat..
- Alex Levine
Money can't buy you happiness .. But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
- Spike Milligan
Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP.
- Joe Namath
I don't feel old.. I don't feel anything until noon.
Then it's time for my nap.
- Bob Hope
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to
work its way through Congress
- Will Rogers
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older,
it will avoid you.
- Winston Churchill
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step,
he's too old to go anywhere
- Billy Crystal
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
- Mark Twain
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.
- George Burns
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain
By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy;
if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
I have never hated a man enough to give back his diamonds.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat..
- Alex Levine
Money can't buy you happiness .. But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
- Spike Milligan
Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP.
- Joe Namath
I don't feel old.. I don't feel anything until noon.
Then it's time for my nap.
- Bob Hope
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to
work its way through Congress
- Will Rogers
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older,
it will avoid you.
- Winston Churchill
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step,
he's too old to go anywhere
- Billy Crystal
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
On a serious note-kitchen fires
Don't assume that everyone knows this stuff. Just forward it to everyone you know and maybe they will forward it to someone who doesn't.I never realized that a wet dishcloth can be a one size fits all lid to cover a fire in a pan! This is a dramatic video (30-second, very short) about how to deal with a common kitchen fire... Oil in a frying pan. Read the following Introduction, then watch the show... It's a real eye-opener! At the Fire Fighting Training school they would demonstrate this with a deep fat fryer set on the fire field. An instructor would don a fire suit and using an 8 oz cup at the end of a 10 foot pole toss water onto the grease fire. The results got the attention of the students. The water, being heavier than oil, sinks to the bottom where it instantly becomes superheated. The explosive force of the steam blows the burning oil up and out. On the open field, it became a thirty foot high fireball that resembled a nuclear blast. Inside the confines of a kitchen, the fire ball hits the ceiling and fills the entire room. Also, do not throw sugar or flour on a grease fire. One cup of either creates the explosive force of two sticks of dynamite. This is a powerful message. Watch the video and don't forget what you see. Tell your whole family about this video. Or better yet, send this to them.
This site keeps the video for a week:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/xtsggy
This site keeps the video for a week:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/xtsggy
Slow Down
Farmer Bill lived on a quiet rural highway. But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an alarming rate. The traffic was so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of three to six a day. So one day Farmer Bill called the sheriff's office and said, "You've got to do something about all of these people driving so fast and killing all of my chickens." "What do you want me to do?" asked the sheriff. "I don't care, just do something about those crazy drivers!" So the next day he had the county workers go out and erected a sign that said: SLOW: SCHOOL CROSSING Three days later Farmer Bill called the sheriff and said, "You've got to do something about these drivers. The 'school crossing' sign seems to make them go even faster." So, again, the sheriff sends out the county workers and they put up a new sign: SLOW: CHILDREN AT PLAY That really sped them up. So Farmer Bill called and called and called every day for three weeks. Finally, he asked the sheriff, "Your signs are doing no good. Can I put up my own sign?" The sheriff told him, "Sure thing, put up your own sign. " He was going to let Farmer Bill do just about anything in order to get him to stop calling everyday to complain. The sheriff got no more calls from Farmer Bill. Three weeks later, curiosity got the best of the Sheriff and he decided to give Farmer Bill a call. "How's the problem with those drivers. Did you put up your sign?" "Oh, I sure did. And not one chicken has been killed since then. I've got to go. I'm very busy." He hung up the phone. The sheriff was really curious now and he thought to himself, "I'd better go out there and take a look at that sign. It might be something that WE could use to slow down drivers." So the sheriff drove out to Farmer Bill's house, and his jaw dropped the moment he saw the sign. It was spray painted on a sheet of wood: "NUDIST COLONY - Go slow and watch out for chicks!"
Out of gas?
A woman was driving down the road and ran out of gas.
Just at that moment, a bee flew in her window.
The bee said, What seems to be the problem?
I'm out of gas, the woman replied.
The bee told the woman to wait right there and flew away.
Minutes later, the woman watched as an entire swarm of bees flew to her car
and into her gas tank. After a few minutes, the bees flew out.
Try it now, said one bee. The woman turned the ignition key and the car started right up. Wow!? the woman exclaimed, what did you put in my gas tank?
The bee answered:
The bee answered:
\/
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Wait for it. Wait for it..
...
...
You're just gonna love this.. 
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Sunday, September 20, 2009
Smile
"FLU UPDATE "
What is the difference between Bird Flu and Swine Flu?
For bird flu you need tweetment and for swine flu you need oinkment.
Frugalese
Did you know that Target will honor both its coupon and a manufacturer coupon for each offer?
Rainbow has double coupon Wednesdays - with the caveat that you must spend $25, and the coupon to be doubled cannot exceed $1. My experience is that the produce tends to have a longer life than Target or Cub.
Aldi's sandwich cookies rival Oreo cookies. I actually like them better because the frosting in the middle is softer and squishes out the sides so you can lick them (like in the olden days).
While I rarely shop at Aldi's, other shoppers tell me their produce is less expensive and very fresh.
A good friend provided this unusual and very useful bargain site:
http://www.cheaptoday.com/
Rainbow has double coupon Wednesdays - with the caveat that you must spend $25, and the coupon to be doubled cannot exceed $1. My experience is that the produce tends to have a longer life than Target or Cub.
Aldi's sandwich cookies rival Oreo cookies. I actually like them better because the frosting in the middle is softer and squishes out the sides so you can lick them (like in the olden days).
While I rarely shop at Aldi's, other shoppers tell me their produce is less expensive and very fresh.
A good friend provided this unusual and very useful bargain site:
http://www.cheaptoday.com/
Happy Days!
As we reach autumn, the weather has been unusually warm. It's great for the new lawn that is growing because of the landscaping job just finished a week ago. The front wall of my house had timbers and were decaying. A beautiful block wall now decorates the neighborhood - at least according to my neighbors. They actually exclaimed among one another - you know that new wall on the next block. The one with swirls. Did you see how fast it went up?! (it took 4 days).
Yesterday one of my neighbors celebrated 53 years in the neighborhood with a great neighborhood get-together. It always surprising me when I meet neighbors who live within a block of me. Almost everyone knows me because I'm gardening so often. It was such fun.
The pot luck was indeed a lucky pot - lots of everything! We all ate well. My leftovers I sent home with a large family that might be able to consume that much fruit.
Over this last week I successfully encouraged the lawn - about 1/2 is covered in grass.
Today as well as Friday I enjoyed mini-golf knowing that each time is more precious as the season closes. The honey bees are feasting as are the wasps and hornets. I can't figure out how to kill the wasps and hornets without destroying the honey bees (that I think come from the U of M agricultural campus). So I tried to use a lopper to reach into the garden to cut down some of the weeds. Unfortunately the munchers decided to chase me away - fast! I dropped the lopper and ran a good 30 feet away before they gave up the chase. I've been stung once this season. As the season cools, maybe these hungry bugs will seek shelter. The good news is that I have good reason for such a weedy garden.
Tonight I saw an awesome sunset. As I drove toward Minneapolis on Como Avenue, a huge pink ball sat atop two of the towers - how I wish I would have had a camera. The ball sat between other towers - it looked like the towers were holding it up. The ball looked to be about 1/2 the size of the tallest tower. I hope you got the chance to see that sunset.
Good wishes go to you - Happy Days.
Yesterday one of my neighbors celebrated 53 years in the neighborhood with a great neighborhood get-together. It always surprising me when I meet neighbors who live within a block of me. Almost everyone knows me because I'm gardening so often. It was such fun.
The pot luck was indeed a lucky pot - lots of everything! We all ate well. My leftovers I sent home with a large family that might be able to consume that much fruit.
Over this last week I successfully encouraged the lawn - about 1/2 is covered in grass.
Today as well as Friday I enjoyed mini-golf knowing that each time is more precious as the season closes. The honey bees are feasting as are the wasps and hornets. I can't figure out how to kill the wasps and hornets without destroying the honey bees (that I think come from the U of M agricultural campus). So I tried to use a lopper to reach into the garden to cut down some of the weeds. Unfortunately the munchers decided to chase me away - fast! I dropped the lopper and ran a good 30 feet away before they gave up the chase. I've been stung once this season. As the season cools, maybe these hungry bugs will seek shelter. The good news is that I have good reason for such a weedy garden.
Tonight I saw an awesome sunset. As I drove toward Minneapolis on Como Avenue, a huge pink ball sat atop two of the towers - how I wish I would have had a camera. The ball sat between other towers - it looked like the towers were holding it up. The ball looked to be about 1/2 the size of the tallest tower. I hope you got the chance to see that sunset.
Good wishes go to you - Happy Days.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Mary Poppins
Orpheum brags about the Mary Poppins performance and rightfully so. The singing, dancing, scenery, lighting, and acting were all great. While my nostalgia remains for the original production, this was very entertaining. It ran almost three hours.
You can buy rush tickets for students at only $20/ticket. Sorry, Seniors, no discount for you.
You can buy rush tickets for students at only $20/ticket. Sorry, Seniors, no discount for you.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
The Wooden Bowl
This was sent to me:
The Wooden Bowl
I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. 'We must do something about father,' said the son. 'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded, 'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up. ' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.You nee d to be able to throw something back sometimes. I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
The Wooden Bowl
I guarantee you will remember the tale of the Wooden Bowl tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, a year from now.
A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.
The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. 'We must do something about father,' said the son. 'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.
When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had a tear in his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.
The four-year-old watched it all in silence.
One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly, the boy responded, 'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up. ' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done.
That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.
On a positive note, I've learned that, no matter what happens, how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands.You nee d to be able to throw something back sometimes. I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Geography quiz
One of my friends shared with me this web site address. Check your geography competence. Just take the country names and place them on the related shapes.
http://www.rethinkingschools.org/just_fun/games/mapgame.html
http://www.rethinkingschools.org/just_fun/games/mapgame.html
For my lady friends
This info came from Web MD and thought it was interesting. Something that I've not seen before:
TEST High-sensitivity C-reactive protein
This simple test measures the amount of inflammation in your body by examining levels of high-sensitivity C-reactive protein (CRP) in your bloodstream. The body naturally produces an inflammatory response to fight off infections and heal wounds. “But chronically high levels may cause your blood vessels to harden or fat to build up in your arteries,” says Goldberg. In fact,
CRP may be an even stronger predictor of heart disease than cholesterol: According to a study in the New England Journal of Medicine, women with elevated CRP levels were more likely to suffer from cardiovascular disease than those with high cholesterol.
Excess CRP has also been linked to the development of other problems, including diabetes, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s disease. “The test is like an early warning system for your entire body,” says Goldberg. If your level is high (a score of 3 milligrams per liter or more), your physician may recommend that you exercise 30 minutes a day and up your intake of produce, whole grains, and lean protein. She also may suggest taking medications, such as cholesterol-lowering statins or aspirin, to fight inflammation.
WHO NEEDS IT Women with several risk factors for heart disease, meaning those with high cholesterol (200 or more milligrams per deciliter) and blood pressure (140/90 millimeters or more of mercury) and a family history of early heart disease. Ask for the high-sensitivity CRP test rather than the standard one, which is used for diagnosing conditions such as inflammatory bowel disease. The screen costs about $60 and is covered by most insurance plans.
TEST Vitamin B12
If you never seem to have enough energy, this simple screen may be in order. It measures the amount of vitamin B12 in the blood, which helps maintain healthy nerve cells and red blood cells in the body. “In addition to fatigue, low levels of this nutrient can cause numbness or tingling in the arms and legs, weakness, loss of balance, and anemia,” says Lloyd Van Winkle, M.D., a clinical associate professor at the University of Texas Health Science Center in San Antonio.
Over the long run, a vitamin B12 deficiency can raise your risk for depression and dementia. If you’re diagnosed with the condition, your doctor can prescribe high-dose supplements in pill, shot, or nasal spray form. She may also test you for pernicious anemia, a disease in which the body is unable to absorb vitamin B12 properly.
WHO NEEDS IT Consider this test if you’re a vegetarian, since the only dietary sources of vitamin B12 come from animals. One German study found that 26 percent of vegetarians and 52 percent of vegans had low B12 levels. You should also ask your doctor about the test, which costs $5 to $30 and is covered by insurance plans, if you have any of the symptoms mentioned above.
The other two overlooked tests are Audiograms for those that might have injured hearing over time and Glaucoma. Presuming with your a regular eye check, you are getting the Glaucoma test.
Hope this info is useful.
TEST High-sensitivity C-reactive protein
This simple test measures the amount of inflammation in your body by examining levels of high-sensitivity C-reactive protein (CRP) in your bloodstream. The body naturally produces an inflammatory response to fight off infections and heal wounds. “But chronically high levels may cause your blood vessels to harden or fat to build up in your arteries,” says Goldberg. In fact,
CRP may be an even stronger predictor of heart disease than cholesterol: According to a study in the New England Journal of Medicine, women with elevated CRP levels were more likely to suffer from cardiovascular disease than those with high cholesterol.
Excess CRP has also been linked to the development of other problems, including diabetes, high blood pressure, and Alzheimer’s disease. “The test is like an early warning system for your entire body,” says Goldberg. If your level is high (a score of 3 milligrams per liter or more), your physician may recommend that you exercise 30 minutes a day and up your intake of produce, whole grains, and lean protein. She also may suggest taking medications, such as cholesterol-lowering statins or aspirin, to fight inflammation.
WHO NEEDS IT Women with several risk factors for heart disease, meaning those with high cholesterol (200 or more milligrams per deciliter) and blood pressure (140/90 millimeters or more of mercury) and a family history of early heart disease. Ask for the high-sensitivity CRP test rather than the standard one, which is used for diagnosing conditions such as inflammatory bowel disease. The screen costs about $60 and is covered by most insurance plans.
TEST Vitamin B12
If you never seem to have enough energy, this simple screen may be in order. It measures the amount of vitamin B12 in the blood, which helps maintain healthy nerve cells and red blood cells in the body. “In addition to fatigue, low levels of this nutrient can cause numbness or tingling in the arms and legs, weakness, loss of balance, and anemia,” says Lloyd Van Winkle, M.D., a clinical associate professor at the University of Texas Health Science Center in San Antonio.
Over the long run, a vitamin B12 deficiency can raise your risk for depression and dementia. If you’re diagnosed with the condition, your doctor can prescribe high-dose supplements in pill, shot, or nasal spray form. She may also test you for pernicious anemia, a disease in which the body is unable to absorb vitamin B12 properly.
WHO NEEDS IT Consider this test if you’re a vegetarian, since the only dietary sources of vitamin B12 come from animals. One German study found that 26 percent of vegetarians and 52 percent of vegans had low B12 levels. You should also ask your doctor about the test, which costs $5 to $30 and is covered by insurance plans, if you have any of the symptoms mentioned above.
The other two overlooked tests are Audiograms for those that might have injured hearing over time and Glaucoma. Presuming with your a regular eye check, you are getting the Glaucoma test.
Hope this info is useful.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Friday, September 4, 2009
Mime at its best
Robert Murac in Italy did this performance. Amazing. This is a wave file of 5 MB for those of you with slower computers or workplace limitation: http://www.sendspace.com/file/5yhf5i
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Older technology
Do you have old I-Pods, I-Phones, or computer?
Checkout BestBuy.com or NextWorth.com They buy some older technology. In other cases they will recycle the unit for free and clean off the hard drive so no one else will be able to retrieve old files. (This tip come from KARE11 TV.)
Checkout BestBuy.com or NextWorth.com They buy some older technology. In other cases they will recycle the unit for free and clean off the hard drive so no one else will be able to retrieve old files. (This tip come from KARE11 TV.)
September 2, 2009
For those of you who know Mark, it is his birthday tomorrow, the 3rd. Happy Birthday!
For State Fair goers:
Don't miss the Shenanigans that play at noon, 3 pm and 6 pm. I don't know if they return next year. It's a great Wild West show next to Heritage Square (where the big top was last year).
Happy Days - of course, it is important to play. If you feel you need an excuse, bear on mind it
staves off Azheimers.
Fun web sites:
www.pogo.com
www.realarcade.com
www.braingle.com/
http://flashfabrica.com/f_learning/brain2/e_brain02.html
Deals:
In the prior blog I suggested going to Target. The link is:
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=coupons%5fspecials
The nicest part of this site is that it lets you print only coupons you want to use and if you want more of a particular coupon, it will let you print more.
Need house repair?
One contractor performed so well, I'd guarantee that you will get a great price with a great job.
The company is Morgan Tree Service. The two people I met were incredibly knowledgeable about trees, disease, as well as potential problems. The best news for me and one of the people that used my recommendation is that they allayed concerns about trees that looked like they might be a problem.
For the domestic readers: Ideas came from the Idaho Potato Commission
Remove tarnish from stored silverware by soaking in potato water. (sure beat polishing)
Rub your hands with a peeled potato to get rid of hard-to-remove stains from foods like carrots.
Anti-fog your sunglasses or ski goggles by rubbing a raw potato over the lenses before you
go outside.
Apply slices of raw, cold potatoes to your eyelids to reduce puffiness.
Have geraniums? Carve a small hole in a potato, slip a geranium stem into the hole and
plant the whole thing, potato and all. The potato will provide the plant with the extra
nutrients it needs to flourish.
If you have a small arrangement of flowers but have none of that green floral foam on hand to
stick the flower stems in, try a large Russet potato. Cut it in half lengthwise and place it cut
side down. Poke holes where you want the flowers and then insert the stems.
The next time you need a hot compress, boil a potato, wrap it in a towel, and apply to the area.
Refrigerate a boiled potato for a cold compress.
Make a stencil. Cut a potato in half, carve a design into it, dip it in paint and stencil away! This idea works really well for children.
More household ideas?
Did You Know That? Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately -- without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers."
Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns.
Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.
Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.
Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1 tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.
Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly -- even though the product was never been advertised for this use. (Note: Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same..and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.)
Honey remedy for skin blemishes... Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.
Listerine therapy for toenail fungus... Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.
Easy eyeglass protection... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.
Coca-Cola cure for rust... Forget those expensive rust removers. Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain. The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.
Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer... If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409. Insects drop to the ground instantly. Sprays of most kind will work. Once the flying bug has its wings affected by a spray, it drops.
Smart splinter remover...just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks to the dried glue.
Hunt's tomato paste boil cure....cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.
Balm for broken blisters...To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine .. a powerful antiseptic.
Heinz vinegar to heal bruises... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.
Quaker Oats for fast pain relief....It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.
Need a long distance telephone directory? Try...
www.dexonline.com
www.Switchboard
www.Whitepages.com
www.Whowwhere.lycos.com
www.anywho.com
Do you have a dog? This might be helpful...
To repel fleas, add 1 teaspoon of vinegar to each quart of your dog's drinking water to help repel fleas and ticks. Also, put a drop of lemon oil or rosemary oil on the dog's collar. It seems that these pests don't like the smell.
Kills fleas instantly. Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick. Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly. Rinse well to avoid skin irritations. Goodbye fleas.Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.
And for a cat?
Eliminate ear mites... All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.
Have a great day - happy days, Nancy
For State Fair goers:
Don't miss the Shenanigans that play at noon, 3 pm and 6 pm. I don't know if they return next year. It's a great Wild West show next to Heritage Square (where the big top was last year).
Happy Days - of course, it is important to play. If you feel you need an excuse, bear on mind it
staves off Azheimers.
Fun web sites:
www.pogo.com
www.realarcade.com
www.braingle.com/
http://flashfabrica.com/f_learning/brain2/e_brain02.html
Deals:
In the prior blog I suggested going to Target. The link is:
http://sites.target.com/site/en/supertarget/page.jsp?title=coupons%5fspecials
The nicest part of this site is that it lets you print only coupons you want to use and if you want more of a particular coupon, it will let you print more.
Need house repair?
One contractor performed so well, I'd guarantee that you will get a great price with a great job.
The company is Morgan Tree Service. The two people I met were incredibly knowledgeable about trees, disease, as well as potential problems. The best news for me and one of the people that used my recommendation is that they allayed concerns about trees that looked like they might be a problem.
For the domestic readers: Ideas came from the Idaho Potato Commission
Remove tarnish from stored silverware by soaking in potato water. (sure beat polishing)
Rub your hands with a peeled potato to get rid of hard-to-remove stains from foods like carrots.
Anti-fog your sunglasses or ski goggles by rubbing a raw potato over the lenses before you
go outside.
Apply slices of raw, cold potatoes to your eyelids to reduce puffiness.
Have geraniums? Carve a small hole in a potato, slip a geranium stem into the hole and
plant the whole thing, potato and all. The potato will provide the plant with the extra
nutrients it needs to flourish.
If you have a small arrangement of flowers but have none of that green floral foam on hand to
stick the flower stems in, try a large Russet potato. Cut it in half lengthwise and place it cut
side down. Poke holes where you want the flowers and then insert the stems.
The next time you need a hot compress, boil a potato, wrap it in a towel, and apply to the area.
Refrigerate a boiled potato for a cold compress.
Make a stencil. Cut a potato in half, carve a design into it, dip it in paint and stencil away! This idea works really well for children.
More household ideas?
Did You Know That? Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately -- without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers."
Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns.
Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.
Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.
Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1 tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.
Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly -- even though the product was never been advertised for this use. (Note: Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same..and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.)
Honey remedy for skin blemishes... Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.
Listerine therapy for toenail fungus... Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.
Easy eyeglass protection... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.
Coca-Cola cure for rust... Forget those expensive rust removers. Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain. The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.
Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer... If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409. Insects drop to the ground instantly. Sprays of most kind will work. Once the flying bug has its wings affected by a spray, it drops.
Smart splinter remover...just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks to the dried glue.
Hunt's tomato paste boil cure....cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.
Balm for broken blisters...To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine .. a powerful antiseptic.
Heinz vinegar to heal bruises... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.
Quaker Oats for fast pain relief....It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.
Need a long distance telephone directory? Try...
www.dexonline.com
www.Switchboard
www.Whitepages.com
www.Whowwhere.lycos.com
www.anywho.com
Do you have a dog? This might be helpful...
To repel fleas, add 1 teaspoon of vinegar to each quart of your dog's drinking water to help repel fleas and ticks. Also, put a drop of lemon oil or rosemary oil on the dog's collar. It seems that these pests don't like the smell.
Kills fleas instantly. Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick. Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly. Rinse well to avoid skin irritations. Goodbye fleas.Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.
And for a cat?
Eliminate ear mites... All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.
Have a great day - happy days, Nancy
Mark's Birthday
In celebrating Mark's birthday a day early, he suggested a blog would be fun. As many of you know, I'm a bargain hunter and enjoy practical advice.
So, this is the first bit of blogging.
Specials:
Thanks to Mark, find coupons good for three weeks at Target.
For a $2 coupon off of Honey Bunches of Oats - Pecan, go to:
http://www.postcereals.com/honeybunchesofoats/ Rainbow charges $2.99 per box.
Like Minneapolis Institute of Art? If you go there by 9/6/09, you can see an exhibit of Artist Hunt whose pictures seem three dimensional. If you say you know about the dot.com special, you can get a two for one special.
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